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Gaadi tu hi chala rha tha ...

2 Dost Daaru pee ke Gaadi chala rhe the.

Tabhi 1 chillaya, "Deewar... Abbe samne dekh deewar hai.... Deewar... Dewaar dekh ......" Dhadaaaaam!

They hit the wall. 

The next day in the Hospital 1st asked 2nd - 
"Mein chilla chilla k bol rha tha Deewar hai Deewar hai... suna kyu nhi tu ne??"



2nd answered him,
"Sun ke kya karta Bewde...... Gaadi tu hi chala rha tha ...!!"

Happy Drinking

A husband wakes up with a hangover....
He opens his eyes n sees aspirins and water.

He sits down & sees his clothes all clean & pressed....

He takes the aspirin & finds a note "honey, breakfast's on table, I left to buy groceries. Love you"

Totally shocked,
He goes to the kitchen 4 breakfast there he finds his son & asks him "What happened last nite?".

Son says "Well Dad u came home.  @ 3am, drunk & delirious, broke all d crockery, puked in the hall & made a total mess....

Confused he asks, "then y is everything in order?" 

Son says, "Oh! Mom dragged u 2 the room tried 2 take ur clothes off & you said
"LADY LEAVE ME ALONE! I'M MARRIED!"

I cant ditch her......

MORAL:

Self induced hangover - 4000
broken Crockery - 10000
But saying the right thing when drunk........

Happy Drinking

Second Type: Your own wife

There are two types of wives.

First Type: 
Quiet, Beautiful, Understanding, Not Argumentative, Loving, One who listens to husband

Second Type: 
Your own wife

Good one...Sounds interesting......

Did U know? - 
If you chew gum when you study a subject & then chew the same flavour when you take the test it can help you remember.

Did U know? - 
People who speak two languages, may unconsciously change their personality when they switch languages.

Did U know? - 
If you still feel tired after a good night's sleep, you're probably dehydrated. Drink some water after you wake up.

Did U know? - 
Psychology claims, that mood where everything irritates you indicates that you're actually missing someone.

Did U know? - 
People who swear a lot tend to be more honest, loyal & upfront with their friends.

Did U know? - 
People who laugh more are able to tolerate pain better, both physical & emotional.

Did U know? - 
The first person who comes to Ur mind once you wake up in the morning & the Person U Think About Before U Fall Asleep is usually the one U love the most.

Did U know? - 
As you become close to someone, you can hear their voice in your head when you read their texts.

Did U know? - 
good friends are like stars you don't always see them but you know they are there..

Plz forgive me if u die laughing

This is an actual letter taken for a response to a `Marriage Proposal' advertisement:

Madam,
I am one young gentleman living only with myself in Patna. I am seeing ur advertisement for marriage purpose in the daily newspaper. So I decide to press myself on u and I am hopping you will make the marriage with me.

I am the son of my father & mother of agriculture family from inside Patna. I having no sister and no brother also. I become big in Patna only. I educate myself in the Zuarilal Himmatlal High School, Bezna Road.

I am nice and big, six foots tall and six inches long. My body is filled with hardness why because I am working hardly. I am playing also hardly. Especially I am liking the cricket. I am a good batter also I am fast baller. Whenever I am coming running for the balling, all batters are running everywhere why because they are afraiding my balls. My balls are bouncing too much high. That is very danger for them.

I am very nice gentleman. I always laughing loudly at everyone. I am happy always and gay also. Ladies they are saying I am nice and soft because I giving respect to them. I am always liking if ladies are on top. That is how nice I am.

I am not having any bad habits. I drink milk only and no other bad things. I am not chewing cigarettes or eating gutka paan why because it not good for all the peoples. So I am not doing so.

I am keep fitting everyday. Morning I am going to jim and I am pumping like anything. Daily I am pumping and pumping. If you want you can came and see how I pumping the dumb bells in the jim. And now good muscles are come outing everywhere.

I am having very much money in my pant everyday and my pant is everyday open for you why because I am nice gentleman, but still I am living with myself only. What to do? So I am taking my things into my own hands everyday. That is why I want to press myself on you, so that you will come and take my things into your hands.

RIP ENGLISH

Dear customer you have insufficient balance to send this message. Please recharge your account and try again

A guy was in love with a girl but never had the guts to tell her.

One night around at 10, he gathered some courage & sent her a text with these honest words...

"Doreen, I love you, Plz reply & tell me how you feel."

A few seconds later he received a message alert on his phone.

He was so scared and too tensed to open it that night so he decided not to check the message until the next morning when he's less tense and in better senses.

So he went to sleep.

When he woke up the next day he prayed seriously about the message for good news,
went about doing his morning chores, brushed his teeth, ate his breakfast took a bath,
dressed himself up then climbed into bed and picked his phone to read the message on his phone.

This was the response he read:

"Dear customer you have
insufficient balance to send this message. Please recharge your account and try again".

Don't laugh alone!

Share it..

Task to the BRAIN:

Same Letter is Missing three times in each word:

Fill the Blanks...

1. M — L—RI—

2. DI—MI— —

3. — INI—U—

4. A — TE — —A

5. BA— — A— E

6. R—L—AS—

7. —U — — IES

8. A — — RAC—

9. CHA— — I —

10. — AXI — U—